While tattoos never return to their fresh brightness you see right after a tattoo, you’re looking at it through a bunch of dying skin that will just have to slough off naturally. Do what everyone else said, and for God’s sake, don’t fucking pick it.

I’m so glad we live in the age of fake breasts, so I never become that old lady.

Oh, I’ve seen some ugly tits. I’m sure I could convince you to agree.

My diet is in some sort of downward spiral where I make less and less effort. I’ve gone from cooking fresh foods, to Lean Cuisine meals, to Lean Cuisine meals that don’t require a fork.

That’s the sort of tattoo you can only pull off if you have perfect breasts. She can pull it off.

Welcome!

I honestly didn’t think the ribs and belly were too bad, but I’ve never had my arm tattooed. I thought my thighs were the most painful.

Sam, I’m sorry for what happened. That’s just awful.

Being single again, I bought myself a PlayStation 3. Worked from 6 AM yesterday until 6 AM this morning, came home, and played Mass Effect. I was disturbed by a doctor breaking into my barn who was trying to sneakily remove the landlord’s (her brother’s) stuff. She was ranting about him…[Read more]

Warm wet compresses! Get the pus out.

I’m not a big “go to the ER because of a little pus” person. As long as you don’t have a fever, it sounds like you know how to treat a wound.

I’ve seen a lot of infected belly button piercings (maybe eight is my qualifier for “a lot”). At least half were just repierces, and 3/4 were professionally done. Make another fresh hole because repiercing scar tissue is compromising already damaged tissue and basically creating a hotbed for infection.

Aww, ain’t your bee sweet?

I got a tattoo on Monday, and oddly enough there were Somalian pirate jokes being made.

No one knows the dark side of me.

It likes to lie around naked watching Jim Jarmusch movies, eating frozen yogurt.

I love the gold and mint ink together.

I’m so happy for you!

And horribly, horribly jealous.

Morbid AND unoriginal? Makes me think of teenage poetry. I approve!

1) Popples are awesome, and that’s fine if you disagree, but you’re wrong.

2) Only in my dreams.

If you don’t love them, I hate you.

@jerryatrophy 138751 wrote:

What is it supposed to be?

I’ll refrain from further comments till the first question is answered.

Pretty sure it’s half-dragon, half-Popple.

It’s the best looking dragon-Popple chimera I’ve ever seen, honestly.

@Sam-I-Am 139585 wrote:

Years ago I injured my penis in a freak accident, and I was amazed how fast it healed.

Fun story: I’ve seen people with the most hideous boils and sores on their genitals, and you see them a month later, and they’re as pink, rosy, and smooth as baby junk.

(I seriously don’t get paid enough to do my job.)

20% + treats for everyone in the shop.

I’m not imaginative.

I knew it had to be a C-name!